Friday, December 21, 2012

On how MLS is (a bit) like love

I might have gone too OA for this but I'm really bored. I'm so talkative.

Pretend today is the viewing of grades. Lots of students -- thousands -- are trying to log in all the same time. The page loads. You wait. And then it tells you that My.LaSalle is down or something. Might be because the system sucks or because so many are trying to log in all at once. Either way, you still can't get in. Just like love, it's gonna be a long wait.

So you're one of the lucky ones who was able to log in. Congratulations! Now, you're determined to do just one thing -- check your damn grades. But a lot of things can happen at this point. What if I want to wander around into the website and, I don't know, check for my clearance or something? What if I accidentally hit refresh? What if I did hit refresh on purpose 'cause I couldn't believe what I just saw?

And to you who's been waiting to get into MLS for ages: Just wait. Well I can't say good things come to those who wait but that's the only thing to do now. You keep waiting and you wonder why it's all taking so long. Alam mo naman kung bakit e. Agawan 'to! MLS is too precious not to be courted by just one student. Lahat kayo gusto siyang pasukin pero minsan torpe ang MLS. Ayaw magpapasok. Gabi na at inaantok ka na, ayaw pa rin magpapasok.

I've been reading that grades were supposed to come out at 11:30, yes? Well it looks like it made you wait a few more hours. Parang love, paasa! But no, you sit still in front of the computer and wait. That's the spirit! You've been courting this girl for years and you're determined to get her...uh...matamis na oo! Good for you. But then you realize you can just sleep this off and check your grades tomorrow. Pwes, duwag ka! Stay up all night despite the many times that MLS has rejected you!

Meanwhile, you tweet a few rants, 'cause I don't know, people like to rant about MLS just as much as everybody else tweets about love, yes? Yeah, right, 'cause MLS deserves the same amount of attention.

Speaking of tweets, I have managed to categorize all tweets (and Facebook posts) into six:
1. The angry tweets. Oh you know, the usual. The kind that gets MLS trending on Twitter. FUCK YOU MLS!!! MLS YOU SUCK!!!
2. The passers. There's the occasional thank you's which make me wonder, have you ever acknowledged your own efforts? I wanna thank Him for my good grades. :(( Couldn't have done this without You! :((
3. The failures. Well. OMG I did not deserve this!!! :((((
4. The know-it-all tweets. You know, tweets from those who think they know how to solve the problem. We need better servers. Dapat per college ang log in.
5. The perv tweets. Just because some people take the green-bloodedness literally. Ugh hindi ko mapasok si MLS! Parang whore ang MLS, ang daming gustong pumasok!
6. The sawi tweets. Which inspired this blog entry. Para talagang love ang MLS. Agawan! Tapos pag nakuha mo na, after mong hintayin nang matagal, bagsak pala.

So you finally get in and you check your grades and see that you:
a.) failed (which isn't necessarily a 0.0 to some). All these waiting just to get your heart broken by that 1.5 that killed your DL dreams or that 0.0 that marked the end of your stay in DLSU, or we can put it as the break up that marks the end of your relationship.
b.) passed. Congratulations again! You are now happy and can therefore ignore your friends' hate tweets 'cause they still haven't logged in or 'cause they failed. Well that's not your problem now, is it?

So that 0.0-slash-break-up thing happened to me. I transferred to CSB and we have this Student Information System thing which we call SIS (duh). It's simpler and not as feature-packed as MLS, but hey, it works. And I'm happier.

And now I'm just reading all your desperate tweets about MLS. This (I think, I wouldn't know) is what happens when you're in a nice, stable relationship. Now I hope that translates into real life.

Wednesday, October 10, 2012

The Birthday Post

I don't exactly know why I'm writing this.


Your birthday is that one day of the year where you're guaranteed to receive all the love in the world (or at least the love you think you deserve, to quote Perks). At some point it defines how relevant you are to other people but more importantly how relevant you are to yourself. I guess we're not all required to feel the same way, but hey, this is coming from a fairly insecure guy. It's funny what birthdays do to your ego -- whether by others or by yourself.

Okay I'm only saying all this because for the first time I tried to be busy on my birthday. I tried to take my mind off things (such as having to bother thinking how to celebrate it) which sort of made matters worse because by taking my mind off things I only highlighted what these things are. Anyway, I guess by keeping myself busy on such a special day proves how relevant I am to myself. While other people text me the loveliest messages I have ever received I go sulk in the corner and let myself feel unimportant to, well, myself.

It's 2:05 AM as of this writing and this is such a bad time for me to write anything, so here are what I'm trying to say:
1. I am super sensitive with my birthday, apparently.
2. Overthinking is overkill.
3. Don't ever work on your birthday. Nobody deserves that.
4. Somebody please tell me how normal people celebrate birthdays.

Here's to another poorly-constructed blog post I will regret in the morning.

Saturday, September 29, 2012

The All-Important Birthday Wishlist

It's 11:11 PM as of this writing and y'all know what that means -- time to write my birthday wishlist! Okay, basically this is just a list of the things I want which I can't have. Haha! Here goes:

1. Kenzo x Vans
Look at these babies. How could you not love them? I love these three. LOVE.

These look amazeballs too.

2. (Low) Dr. Martens
I need these in my life; hence, the size of the photo. That's all.

3. Foster The People
Because I want to watch a concert before I turn 20 (which is sad 'cause the concert is after my birthday) and because I love them.


And here are some things I'm too lazeballs to find a relevant picture of:

4. Dinner (a.k.a. buffet) with friends
I don't know if any of you have noticed (or if it's even noticeable) but I gained some weight since last year. I'm glad I finally got to write that sentence. I just wanna eat.

5. Time
Ahhh yes we all have that one thing we can't have. Haha. Either I don't have time or I'm just reeeally lazy. I think it's odd I put this on my birthday wishlist but I just thought of it and, hey, I do want it after all.

6. Some random roadtrip
Because I feel like I need to be stolen from this house. I just need to get away from all the fuss, that's all.

7. Books to read
I would've put photos if I knew what I wanted to read, but I don't. Any suggestions?

8. That one thing I just have to put here but can't really divulge

Well this list is surprisingly short. But I have those rare (very rare) moments where I feel like I don't really want anything else. Like I just want to sleep. Haha. Zzz.


Busy Bee


I haven't written anything in a while and I'm sort of feeling talkative tonight. I've also been wanting to revive my blog in a while because lately I've been tweeting a lot -- and I mean a lot -- and I wouldn't wanna vent everything out on Twitter (not that I will do it here). See, I've been feeling talkative.

I'll post something more substantial next time (hopefully something that doesn't involve me) so for now let me grace your browsers with beautiful photos of mine.

First Term, 2012-2013
This is one of the photos Cher (visit her blog at took when I had a shoot for my CNCTPHO class. I just wanna say that last term is my worst term evarrrr. I've been really busy with several things and, well, certain commitments have taken their toll on me. I'm just hoping things will change after this term.

Feeling Corpo
Okay, I just wanna say that this is the first time I've worn faux corpo to school. That's all. Oh, and we ate at The Burger Project this day. Must try!! I've never had to make my own burger evarrr and I'm glad I did. My burger had chili con carne and onion rings. UH-MAY-ZING.

Just last week I had a random Tuesday with Yuki (of! We had a mini shoot for her blog so I showed her where Cher and I would take photos sometimes. I'm glad I got to catch up with Yuki!!

Okay that's it. I hope I can start writing about relevant stuff soon. Kbye.

Sunday, January 15, 2012

Second Chance

Took photos of SDA for the first time last Wednesday's FOTOGRA class. I brought my lolo's brother's old Asahi Pentax S2 to class so I could ask my prof where I can get it cleaned. It's an old film SLR which came out before the Canon or Nikon SLRs. I'm looking forward to using it in class. I've been memorizing the Sunny 16 rule and its variations.

2012 has been okay so far. Been excited with my new endeavors. I didn't see it coming like this but I knew I'd be baking. Hehe. I really hope we can sustain this.

Shameless plug: Please like The Bekiry on Facebook!

Saturday, December 31, 2011

The world wide consciousness

Never thought I'd write about this. Online, people have this tendency to idealize things and half the time, they probably don't know what they're talking about. In social networks where we are judged by what is seen on our pages, we tend to present ourselves according to what's cool and in a way it makes us dishonest 'cause often how we want to be perceived doesn't match who we really are. We mold ourselves and our actions and our posts and our tweets according to how we want to be seen as or read or thought of, but in a way this gives us a sense of purpose. It molds us for better or for worse. It molds different aspects of us -- our aesthetics, our personalities, etc. I hate how we have to mold ourselves into something, whether forcibly or not, but we have to fit in somewhere. And the anti-norms? I think this is sort of like how The Perks of Being a Wallflower tells us how observation can be an excuse for not participating in life (something I'm good at).

I'm also frustrated by how our emotions are now psychologically programmed depending on the things we see online. Ha, labo. It's phony how we are affected by what may not even be real. In a way the internet has become this wall. You know why. I don't wanna type in something cheesy like, "the internet has become this wall that separates reality from idealism," but I just did. So now you get my point.

But what the hell, this is the internet. We can do whatever.

Saturday, December 10, 2011

Things I want (but can't have) for Christmas!!

Say hello to my unattainable Christmas wishlist!! 

A Balenciaga bag will forever be in any wishlist of mine -- I've been obsessing over them since high school! The Chanel Boy Bag and the Proenza Schouler PS11 'cause I need to stop bringing big bags to school.

Amazon Kindle 'cause my reading habit's back, Canon 60D 'cause it's about time people stop lending me their cameras (many thanks to you guys though), a Macbook 'cause I need a laptop already, and  a BlackBerry just because.

It's a shame I only have two pairs of shoes on my wishlist. I love shoes to death but I can hardly afford them. I can't even buy myself a pair of Chuck Taylors! Nike Air Max 90 and black Vans Authentic for when I want to wear something else besides my overused loafers.

Merry Christmas y'all! ;)

Friday, November 18, 2011

On things I don't know why I'm writing about

I remember this one time, a few months ago, when I suddenly felt I didn't need anything at all. Too vague? Come on, we are constantly in need of a lot of things. Love, affection, good grades, attention, pizza, a glass of water, that tweet from one specific person, things like that. And there was this one point when I felt like I didn't need any of these. It felt weird but it felt good. It lasted for about a few minutes. It's one of those feelings you want to feel right before your death. I didn't know if it was a feeling of contentment or of giving up.

A few days ago a friend was complaining of how other people manage to be happy and how she couldn't. All I said was hey, I've felt that too. Another friend insisted this was just a quarter life crisis, as he called it. He told her that at this point in life, who's to love but yourself? That hit me.

I started reading Para Kay B last week, screenwriter Ricky Lee's first novel. My friends say it's a good read. It presents this proposition: that out of 5 lovers, 4 will end up hurt and that only one will be happy. The book is in Taglish, but mostly in Tagalog. The English phrases show up when you need them, when you're all tired from reading Tagalog. I was tempted to write about love but being alien to its dynamics, I couldn't. Mainly it's about a writer who writes five love stories of five girls (and as expected from the title, only one will end up happy), himself included in the last. I call it bookception. Para Kay B is about a novel named Para Kay B. I'm a bad storyteller so I can't what it's about, really. The point of this paragraph is to point out whether the way he wrote the book was necessary or not. One of the few excitements of venturing into novel writing, I thought of first. But Ricky writes well and he did pull it off. As of this writing, I don't know how the story ends yet. I'm on the last few pages of the last chapter.

On to the cheesy stuff. Gabi-gabi na lang kung anu-anong kadramahan ang tini-tweet ko. I'm getting sick of it. The sympathy of my friends don't help at all. I try to veer away from anything love-related but I find it so easy to dwell on the negative. It's so easy to dwell on hopelessness and despair. My God. I worry so much on making this person mine when I forget how to make myself wantable (let me invent words okay). Love yourself, ika nga. This is getting too cheesy for my life. More cheesy stuff on another blog post, maybe.

For now, on to my homework.